Note: It has been a while since I have posted an actual workout. Lest you all think I have lost my workout chops and am now nothing more than an amazingly clever and incredibly entertaining writer, I thought I would give you and idea of what I have been up to workout wise. Enjoy.

I should just start off by saying that I wasn’t thinking, not really.  It just seemed like a good idea at the time, and there was no other reason- good, bad or as it turns out, evil.

I am talking about my most recent workouts.

I draw from all sorts of odd places for inspiration: other trainers, books, magazines movies, sometimes simple whims and occasionally the voices in my head.

A while back a colleague of mine, Craig Balantyne, made a bit of a splash with a “300″ workout- inspired by the film of the same name.

So the other day for some reason Craig’s workout popped into my head. I thought “Hey 300 is a really cool number.” Plus it was a cool movie too.

 
Ah, inspiration…

So I took Craig’s idea of completing 300 reps in a single workout, and then mixed that with Charles Staley’s EDT style of exercise pairings.

In EDT, or Escalating Density Training, you choose 2 exercises and alternate between the 2 for a given period of time.  This is a huge oversimplification of how the EDT program works, but you get the idea. So instead of concentrating on number of reps per set, you are concentrating on completing as many reps as you can in the given time period.  Each time you do the workout you try to get more reps completed in the same period of time thus increasing the “density” (get it? Escalating Density Training).

But that is not exactly what I did - I just wanted you to know where my head was. Insert your own joke here.

So my goal was to choose 2 exercise pairs (4 exercises total) and complete 75 reps per exercise for a total of… you guessed it 300 reps. I could do as many sets as it took and I did not put a time limit on it either. I would chose weight I thought would cause failure in the 8-10 range.

Now, whenever I create a workout for myself or others my basic philosophy is that if you can do it as prescribed then it was too easy.

Good news, this was not too easy. It was the opposite of easy. It was suck.

I just wanted to choose moves I that knew well and were not technically difficult to perform. Nothing fancy and like I said 300 reps just sounds so cool…

Here is the workout as I designed it:

A1: Deadlift
A2: Bench Press

B1: Kettle Bell Swing
B2: Cable Row

Remember 75 reps each, in as many sets as it takes.  After I finish the “A” pairing, I move on to “B”. No problem.

Problem.

I finished “A” (barely) and thought I was going to die or puke or both. And I was not even sure of the order.

Then I only got 50 reps on each of the “B” moves and had to call it a day- well short of my goal which pissed me off.  I was pretty much useless the rest of the evening and much of the following day.

Time to re-think things. So do you know what I thought for my next workout? 240 is a cool number too.

So I tweaked things a bit. For my next pairings I would go for 60 reps each. Much more plausible (at least for now) and would in all likelihood decrease the chances of me regurgitating in my own gym.

Here are some of my recent (mostly) completed “60’s” workouts:

Workout 1
Posterior Chain / Horz. Push-Pull
A1: Deadlift
A2: Bench Press

B1: Kettle Bell Swing
B2: Cable Row

Workout 2
Anterior Chain / Vert. Push-Pull
A1: Front Squat
A2: KB Pullover Decline Situp

B1: BB Thrusters
B2: Atomic Sit Up

Workout 3 (This one *REALLY* kicked my ass)
Posterior Chain / Horz. Push-Pull
A1: Tire Flip
A2: Dips (Full)

B1: Kettle Bell Swing
B2: Sledge Hammer Slam

Workout 4
Anterior Chain / Vert. Push-Pull
A1: KB Front Squat
A2: BB Clean & Press

B1: BB Thrusters
B2: Hanging Knee Raise (with pull up)

What you can take form this is that it does not take a rocket scientist to put together a cool and challenging workout. All I did was choose a few moves and set a (relatively random) rep goal.  That’s it. Of course I made sure that there was balance- that I was pushing as much as I was pulling, and that I used the back of my legs as much as the front (basically).

Since I kinda came up with this, I will call this training style Rep Goal Training: RGT. (”RGT” also kinda looks like regurgitate, which makes it easy to remember)

All you need to do for RGT is pick a few big moves you know well, alternate between them for a challenging number of reps. Then give it all you got.  If you can do the workout as you designed it, make it harder next time.

As for me I will revisit my new RGT foe the 75’s in the very near future.  I’ll be damned if I will let a stupid randomly chosen number beat me. Next time I will be prepared.

Joshua Carter
http://carterfitness.com

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Right now most of the world is making a big deal about this guy named Michael Phelps. Something about some swimming medals.  Apparently a lot of medals. 

But his aquatic dominance is not the only thing making a splash in the papers… his reported 12,000 calorie diet has been making some serious waves. (I think 2 puns in one sentence deserves some applause, don’t you?  Regardless I’ll stop.)

The average American Phelps’ age consumes about 2000 calories per day and that means Phelps consumes 6 times the norm.

We already know Phelps is an uber quick, alien-human-fish genetically engineered mutant, surely the result of a super secret Area 51 project. But the mad scientists responsible for his manufacture might not have fully realized the energy required to run such a sophisticated machine.

12,000 calories a day is a massive amount by anyone’s standards.

So you might first ask why the hell isn’t Michael Phelps fat?

It all comes down to consumption and expenditure.  The guy may eat like a Dyson vacuum on crack, but he trains like he is possessed by mighty Poseidon himself.

He simply expends as much energy as he consumes, and that keeps his weight constant.  I even heard him say that he can’t seem to break 200 lbs even though he stands 6′4″.

So what happens after the Olympics are over, and his training stops? There is a simple answer to that as well.

Phelps at the 2012 Olympic Games?

If Phelps continued to consume at his current rate and ceased all physical activity he would in all likely hood blow up like a blow fish (dammit, another pun).  I actually see this a lot in former college athletes who graduate and then get a real job and “normal” life- (the getting fat part that is, they do not actually resemble sea creatures).

To maintain weight, expenditure must equal consumption.  To lose weight expenditure has to exceed consumption.  Pretty simple (on paper anyway).

In truth I don’t think Phelps will ever have a big problem for a few crucial reasons:

1. His normal metabolism is probably really high
2. He is probably one who has to force himself to eat
3. He needs to be in the water for several hours per day or his gills dry out

Not many of us are blessed with the seemingly super-charged metabolism of Michael Phelps.  If you or I tried to consume 12,000 calories in a day you would probably wind up in the hospital. I’m sure Phelps worked up to it.

But it all comes down to what comes in and what goes out. If you want to lose weight you need to (God help me I am going to quote Oprah) move more and eat less.

It’s just that simple.

(Big) butt like I said earlier this very simple concept, when placed into our real world everyday lives, can be quite difficult to put into practice.

You can either learn to deal with it, make adaptations and choices conducive to the way you want to look and the health you need to thrive, or end up looking like Jabba the Hutt and get buried in a giant cargo crate at a very early age.

The other slightly less practical option is to swim and workout for 6 plus hours per day. Who knows, you might win a few medals of your own.

I think I’ll workout 3 or 4 times per week for 30 minutes, and watch what I eat 90% of the time and eat like Phelps 10% of the time.

That works for me.

What works for you? Or maybe a better question is what *IS NOT* working for you?

Joshua Carter
http://carterfitness.com

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Josh’s Note: The following posting is by a special guest, my wife Denyse Carter.

Denyse’s Note: I wrote the following in response to the many nice things my husband writes about and does for me and to show him, that yes, I do take an interest in his work

As the first lady of Carter Fitness, I am often asked “What’s it like being a trainer’s wife?” My usual response is to say that, contrary to what they may imagine, it’s a fairly typical existence. But recently I reflected on this question, truly thought about what they might be getting at.

Considering how the average person might live I tried to visualize the expectations of these questioners. Do they picture restricted mealtimes and bootcamp-like drills run throughout my house? Perhaps they envision guilt trips or sneaked snacks or even lectures about what to serve for dinner. Do they assume my grocery list is ripped from an “approved foods” appendix of a trainer’s manual? Or maybe they simply imagine having one’s eating and exercise habits under constant scrutiny of a fitness trainer may be cause for tension.

Let me just state that this is not at all the case. However, as I pondered further I came to realize that perhaps by comparison, the Carter Family’s lifestyle might seem somewhat regimented.

 
Putting the kids on a work regimen.

First, I must emphasize that Josh has never pressured me to be fit nor is he critical of my food choices. I never feel chastised or judged in any way. Even if I do indulge in some “forbidden food” or slouch on the couch all day I hear nary a complaint from my beloved. He is by nature supportive, tenderhearted and never one to criticize.

But enough of about him – back to me!

While I don’t consider myself a health fanatic nor, as I have established, am I a victim of trainer(husband) stink-eye, somehow the choices I make for myself and my family truly are rooted in health. I prepare and serve lean, low carb meals and healthy snacks. I don’t let the kids load up on sugar or junk. Exercise is a routine part of our lives. On occasion we allow ourselves some decadent treats.

Getting in some exercise -it can be fun!

As I have stated our “healthy” lifestyle is not a product of any urging or nagging by my husband-the-trainer. And I certainly wasn’t programmed for it. I am an admitted sweet tooth, raised on nightly ice cream desserts. My enthusiasm for exercise can’t hold a candle to Josh’s.

I’m a below-average cook (sorry honey!) and I haven’t a clue how to make vegetables taste yummy. Yet with no overt demands from my hubby, my family has avoided becoming a statistic in America’s rising obesity rate. In spite of what might seem like my own natural inclination toward junk food, my home is full of selections you would expect to find in a trainer’s cupboard.

So how did we get there? My now innate mind-set regarding nutrition/fitness actually came about in a gradual and inadvertent manner. While Josh has never lectured me on the topic, it’s not to say he doesn’t care. He has taught me a great deal both directly and by example, thus he knows that I am well-informed. Having a husband whose passion is nutrition, exercise and general betterment of the human form, tends to rub off on a gal. As the designated meal preparer, I started making and sharing meals that fit Josh’s personal nutrition plan.

Inspired by his lead, and the results he continually achieves with clients, I was naturally inclined to pick up these habits for myself. The “change” was not drastic or painful. It wasn’t scary. Frankly, I didn’t even notice, but I was becoming naturally health-conscious. It eventually sneaks in and becomes your way of life. When you start feeling the results of taking care of your body, it doesn’t seem natural to revert to the old ways.

Just as Josh’s training partner (and our mutual friend) said having kept 100 pounds off for several years under Josh’s guidance, “I can’t imagine ever going back to the way I was.” It was truly a different life.

 
Our friend Norm…lean for life.

This is not to say that I am perfect (nor does Josh expect that of me) or that I don’t indulge in less optimal foods. I do. But even then I am more inclined to reach for a low sugar hunk of dark chocolate rather than a sickly sweet Snickers bar. With time, you really can lose your taste for less healthy foods. Once you have committed to the new ways you instinctively start to modify recipes, choose lower fat/carb menu items, and save the junk for the “cheat day” or as an occasional treat. (Believe me, it tastes better when you have been saving up for it anyway.)

As for working out, anyone who has exercised regularly can tell you how crappy you feel without it. Just try taking a week off.

Now let me talk about the kids. Of course we all want our children to be healthy but giving them an appreciation of this takes more than just good intentions. I am so grateful to Josh for raising them in an environment of physical fitness. This is not to say that our wee ones are deprived of coveted childhood treats. They just know these are reserved as (in the words of the new and improved Cookie Monster) “sometimes foods” or we substitute them with healthier versions.

 
Enjoying a sometimes food.

And the kids can still be kids.

My 5 year old has been known to shove a whole cookie in his mouth before dinner rather than relinquish it to a demanding mommy’s outstretched hand. And don’t even try to pry a milkshake away from my toddler whose “stay away” eyes and furrowed brow can only be matched by the iron grip on his sippy cup. But when his milkshake is a fresh fruit smoothie and the cookie is made with Splenda instead of sugar then everyone wins.

Stay Away Eyes

I am proud to be married to a man that not only sets an example for his clients but is an inspiration to his wife and kids as well. The boys to want to be just like him and work in daddy’s gym. Awww, yeah it’s cute, but also how wonderful that they are surrounded by an atmosphere of healthy living - since birth!

I am thrilled they will grow up with an advantage in an area that, for so many, can be a struggle later in life. In fact I knew we were doing okay when my oldest said to me the other day, “Thank you for making me healthy meals, Mommy.”

It’s my and Josh’s anniversary this month. In my 16 years with Josh, I have gained a great deal (but not in weight!) I am motivated by him to push hard and to do my best every time I do anything. Josh inspires that in people. True, he is someone who can transform your body, but it ends up being much more than that.

Last year’s anniversary in Hawaii

When you achieve awareness of wellbeing on this level, your whole life is transformed. He has instilled in his clients the drive to give up more than just junk food. Some have abandoned smoking, bad relationships, self-neglect…anything that detracts from their new feel-good way of life.

I understand that such a change can seem scary to your basic bystander. I know that people fear “giving up” foods they love, or disrupting the daily routine. They agonize over the thought of analyzing their food choices or expending coveted energy on exercise. Many have felt this way one time or another. Even Fitness Guru Josh had to work to get where he is now, having spent several years as a chubby child.

 
A chubby teenage Josh.

In truth change can seem hard *at first*. But once that initial step is taken, if you can set aside your resistance to change, you may not even realize that you are re-learning your daily routine. Very quickly these choices become second nature.

My good friend and her spouse, both clients of Josh’s, told me that they were surprised by each other recently when upon meeting at noon they discovered they had each chosen protein shakes for lunch.

So when I say that life as a trainer’s wife is “typical” that is to say I don’t spend my days feeling pressured into eating right and exercising. Rather, I am inspired to do so. I don’t labor over my food choices, my lifestyle dictates them naturally. If our existence seems restrictive, it doesn’t feel that way to me. I know Josh hopes that every life he touches will be made better by enabling individuals to achieve the same for themselves.

To the man who helps so many others, I say thank you for making it so easy to live a healthy and vibrant life with you and our children. And if having your spouse’s unwavering love and support is “typical” then I’m right about life with a trainer. Thanks for bringing fun, health and happiness to our little corner of the world.

Denyse Carter
Go to http://carterfitness.com

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(borrowing the title from the Queen of All Media, Perez Hilton)

It was in fact the mighty Perez Hilton who brought this to my attention.  As cool as the Olympics are, it is actually kinda difficult to find what you want to see.

Weight lifting is one of the safest sports around, but there are still accidents.

I think I first heard the following quote from noted strength coach Eric Cressey, and I think he was quoting someone else. In any event it goes something like this:

If you workout with weights you will end up in the orthopedist’s office.  If you don’t workout with weights you will end up in cardiologist’s office.

I know which one I choose.

The guy in the video below, Janos Baranyai, will definitely be at a orthopedist’s office in the very near future.

Remember when Joe Theisman broke his leg on live TV? Neither do I , but I have seen it since then. This is a similar (yet not quite as bad) video.

Do not press play.  

You have been warned.

I guarantee Janos will be back in the weight room. As I would be.  Bones heal faster than hearts (the biological ones anyway).

Joshua Carter
http://carterfitness.com

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The title makes it sound like I need a special cream or salve.  Maybe I do, but that is not what I am talking about.

Every 4 years the Olympics roll around.  And every time I get the itch.

I think to myself, there must be one sport I could do in the Olympics.  There just must be. Each time I get a little but older and the hope fades a touch, but I still hold on to the dream: Dreaming of scratching the itch.

.

One potential stumbling block is that I have no natural talent for any sport that I am aware of.  So that alone gives me pause, and yet the feelings persist.

One could argue weightlifting as a potential candidate, but I’ll touch on that impossibility in a moment.

I can’t stand being cold, so all winter sports are out.

If there were a sport like curling but done in the summer, say at the beach I would be all set.

I guess my main point is every time the Olympics roll around I get inspired. Inspired to be better than I am.

As I write this the sure to be spectacular (and spectacularly boring) opening ceremonies are 24 hours away.  I’ll still watch.

As of now my 2 main sources of inspiration come from media standouts.  Two women: Dara Torres and Melanie Roach.

Dara Torres
In 2000 the games were in Atlanta. I have the distinct memory of watching a then 33 year old swimming superstar, Dara Torres, on a feature segment on NBC. Among other things, it featured her daily (insane) training schedule and nutrition program.

Dara going really fast

Two things struck me at that time. One was the incredible volume of food she consumed. This colossal consumption was of course offset by the massive daily energy expenditure. Her training volume was exceptionally high (at least to me).

The second thing that struck me was at age 33, she was already 10 years older than the majority of the aquatic competitors in her field.  And many believed she was just too damn old. Those people can kiss her 5 shiny medals won at those games.

Dara Torres - Age 41

Fast forward 8 years.  Dara is now 41, and still “too damn old” and yet is kicking the asses of competitors young enough to be her offspring.

On August 4th 2008, she twice broke her own American record in the 50 meter freestyle, a record she herself set when she was only 15 years old. For those of you doing the math, that was 26 years ago.

She earned her spot on the US Olympic team and in the next two weeks will in all likelihood be the oldest person to medal in a swimming event at the Olympics.

Did I mention she is the mother of a 2 year old?

 
Dara and daughter Tessa

To Dara I say best of luck, go kick the crap out of those cocky whipper snappers. You are without a doubt an inspiration to me personally, and many others to be sure.

FYI- I don’t swim (well).  It would be more accurate to say I sink.

Melanie Roach
I’ll be honest and say that up until a few days ago I had not heard of Melanie Roach.

Melanie is an Olympic style weightlifter and an inspiration.

Melanie lifting double her bodyweight

You might be surprised to know that I really do not know that much about Olympic style lifting. I know the basics, and how I can apply some of those techniques to fat loss etc. but it is truly a different animal.  Just like I’m sure you can drive a car, that does not mean you know how to handle an Indy car.

Back to Melanie…

In 2000 she was all but guaranteed a spot on the US team, but a few weeks prior to the US trials she herniated a disc in her back.  From the stands she watched others compete for the place that was once to be hers.

That must have really sucked.  Bad.

As so often happens, life played out.  Her husband is a Washington State Representative and they own their own business called Roach Gymnastics. In the years following her missing the 2000 games, she also had 3 children, one of whom was diagnosed with autism when he was 2.

In 2005, with 3 kids (one of whom was only 4 weeks old at the time) she decided to get back into the iron game. Her husband and family in full support mode she went into high gear

.
Melanie Roach celebrating a successful lift

On May 17, 2008 at the Robert Ferst Center for the Arts in Atlanta, Georgia, a now 33 year old Melanie qualified for the US Olympic Weightlifting team. One of the oldest competitors in the sport I might add.

I’m sure her biggest numbers are going to be put up in the next few days, but at the trials she put up (over her head) near 240 lbs in the clean and jerk.

Did I mention she is 5′1″ and weighs 117 lbs?  Oh yeah, there’s that.

(BTW- That is why I will never be an Olympic weightlifter.  A woman who is literally half my size can lift more than I can dream above her head. I’ll keep looking for my ideal sport. And looking…)

Go get’em in Beijing Melanie. When I grow up I want to be strong like you.

In Conclusion
Here is what you can take from this: Find inspiration where you can get. Anywhere and everywhere.

I take inspiration all around me: from the boundless energy of my kids, the endless love and support of my wife & family and the unwavering determination of my geriatric (zing!) training partner. That is just to name a few.

What inspires you?

Find it.

Take it.

Use it.

See you in 2012.

Joshua Carter
http://carterfitness.com

PS: Want to see something really inspiring up close and personal? How about free tickets to the Olympics? Just send them to me and I’ll tell you all about it. 

Just kidding, I am talking about taking a tour of my Carter Fitness training facility where everyday men & women just like you are getting in the best shape of their lives. It is a truly inspirational site.  To schedule a time for a free tour or consultation GO HERE.

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It’s always nice when studies can backup what many of us already know to be true from years in the trenches of real world work.

Over the years there have been several smaller similar studies, but this is the largest and longest term study of its kind to date.  The test subjects were split into 3 diet groups, a low fat diet, a low carb diet and a Mediterranean diet.

The Wall Street Journal sums it up quite nicely:

The study, which tracked 322 Israelis for two years, surprisingly found that a low-carb diet, often associated in the U.S. with high levels of meat consumption — was better than a low-fat diet in boosting blood levels of "good" cholesterol, or high-density lipoproteins associated with cardiovascular health benefits.

The only word I take issue with is "surprisingly".  I think those who were surprised have either not read or completely ignored research that has come to similar conclusions in the past.

Was it the fact the fat loss was greater or was it the drastic improvement in blood markers with the low carb dieters?

 
This guy used low carb to get ultra-ripped

In any event the winner is clear.  Low carb dieters lost an average of 12.3 lbs, the Mediterranean dieters lost 10.2, and the low fat dieters lost 7.7 lbs.

I will concede that these numbers are not mind blowing by any means.  But what is important is that it was an even playing field (and low fat got it’s ass kicked.)

You can read the full Wall Street Journal Article on the study Here.

If you are so inclined the full study (yawn) from the New England Journal of Medicine can be found HERE.

Plus, if Katie Couric says it, it must be true:

Let me give some free advice that will get you well on your way to better nutrition and accelerated fat loss. Here are the top 2 things you can do starting TODAY to get it done:

#1 Drop the Carbs
The study above is just the latest proof. So what are you waiting for? Step away from the pasta…

#2 Write it Down
I spoke to this point in a previous post: "Log of Food".  When dieters write down what they eat they lose more weight. How much more? Twice as much. No joke.

So let me break it down for you: Nutrition is not rocket science, and one diet does not "fit" all (get it? that was a pun).  But in most instances intelligent low carb nutrition will help people lose fat and improve health factors faster, and with better compliance.

And one last thing- nothing is written in stone.

Joshua Carter
http://carterfitness.com

Want to know the latest tips and tricks to take your fat loss to the next level? Do not hesitate to Contact Me.

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Not long ago (earlier today actually) I launched an evil and dastardly plot to make other nations fatter.  That way we Americans will seem less piggy in comparison.  Sinister right?

I am well aware I have very little influence one way or the other at this point, but at least I know Mr. T is on my side.

Well it seems Japan has started without me.

Not long ago Pizza Hut in Japan released the "Mega Pizza".

The Actual Mega Pizza - (If You Can Call It That)

This caloric monstrosity has 2 halves:  The "Gourmet" Half and the "Hamburger" Half, all surrounded by "double rolls" which are hot dog AND bacon wrapped in dough.

The Gourmet half includes  bell peppers, Ham, Bacon, Onion, Basil, Mushroom, Bacon bits, black pepper, sliced tomatoes, Italian sausages, and garlic chips.  I swear I see corn flakes in the picture too- that could just be me.

The Hamburger half has hamburgers (made from pork/beef), Green soybeans, corn, red bell peppers.

This Franken-pizza comes with generous sides of ketchup and maple syrup.  Take a second- read that again.  Uh, why?

The large version of this beast clocks in at almost 3000 calories, and I honestly think that is a conservative estimate.

 
At the top it says "Will Make you as Fat As Crazy American!"

Individually I like most of these ingredients, but this random assortment of culinary weirdness just nauseates me.

One taster commented "Its like they combined things that taste and feel like meat (but nothing was actual meat)."

I think it should be called the "WTF" Pizza.  As in when the Japanese Pizza Hut chefs were making it (possibly drunk) one guy said "should we sprinkle corn flakes on the top of the meat like patties?" and the other guy says "Sure, WTF."

In any event I applaud Japan for trying to catch up to the US’s 2/3 obesity rate.  A few more dietary disasters like this and they will be sure to catch up to us within 5 or 6 decades.

Keep up the good work, Japan.

Joshua Carter
http://carterfitness.com

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Speed walking just looks stupid.  I don’t even think it is debatable. But I’ll come back to that.

Just keep walking…

Let me start with some disclosure.  I was a fan of Mr. T in the 80’s.  The first time I saw the mohawked, verbose muscle man encased in gold chains was in Rocky III where he beat the crap out of Sly Stallone.

It was not long after that that he starred as "B.A" Baracs on the hit show "The ‘A’ Team".  I can still hear the the theme song…

"B.A." Stands for "bad attitude" if you were curious.  Side note: One Halloween, my mother, younger brother and step-father all dressed up as Mr. T.  They looked like dorks, if you were curious.

The One and Only Mr. T

Like many TV stars of the past, Mr. T has had his ups & downs. And a man has got to make a living.  So shooting a candy bar cannon at wusses sounds like a pretty decent gig.  Hell, I’d do it for free.

So there is a new ad campaign in England (the ads have not aired in the US) where Mr. T shoots Snickers bars through a machine gun at less than manly men, telling then to "Get Some Nuts."  That alone makes me snicker.

In the following spot Mr. T is targeting a speed walker.

Now I will admit that I believe speed walking is probably the stupidest looking sport there is.  It just looks absolutely ridiculous.  Some people might even argue it is the gayest looking sport around (some people would, certainly not me, I’m far to enlightened.)

I’m not saying it’s easy. I’m not even saying it is not a sport.  I’m saying if you choose to speed walk you are knowingly taking part in an activity that makes you look like a giant dork.  You are *asking* to be pelted with high velocity confections.

Anyway, I thought the ad was funny.  Not outstandingly hysterical, but funny.

Here it is:

Silly right?  Well apparently the folks at Snickers got 2 (yes two) complaints and then pulled the ad in fear that it could be seen as offensive towards gays.   I guess English gay rights groups got up in arms too.

This is making the HUGE leap that being a speed walking dufus somehow makes you gay.

Sister, please.

That would mean by extension that being gay makes you a dork. I have found quite the opposite to be true.  I am sure there are gay dorks out there.  Statistically they must exist, I have just never met one.

Now I know gays.  And I certainly know offensive.  I even know offensive gays. But that ad is not offensive.

Maybe the English are particularly sensitive to gay issues because most Americans can’t tell if and Englishmen is gay or just an Englishmen.

Anyway, here it is…

Whoever started with all this fuss needs to eat a Snickers and lighten up. That’s right, I said it - chomp down on that nutty, nougaty, chocolaty goodness you English girly man, whoever you are, and then chill the F out.

***You read it here folks- fitness boy Josh wants someone to eat a Snickers- many actually. But take note this is directed solely at Great Britain. This is just the start of my sinister plot to make other countries as fat as the US (making us look thinner in comparison).

Canada be ware, you are the target of my next volley.

If I have my way, Mr. T will be shooting a shotguns full of Reese’s Pieces in the Great White North very soon.

Joshua Carter
http://carterfitness.com

PS: Hey France, I have my eye on you…

2 Comments »

Damn Nintendo Wii.  Ruining everything.  I thought that I was on the cutting edge, delivering state of the art fat loss training and nutrition programs online and at my highly regarded Carter Fitness training facility in beautiful West Hills, Ca. But apparently that is not the case.

I saw this commercial and I just knew.  I knew I was glimpsing the future.

Who needs a highly educated, inventive, motivating trainer with over 15 years of in the trenches experience guiding you every step of the way?

Not you.  All you need is a video game.

Thank you, Nintedo Wii.

Joshua Carter
http://carterfitness.com

PS: If you do not feel comfortable entrusting the future of your health and fitness to the makers of Mario Brothers, feel free to contact me.  I now have online training, in person training and fat loss bootcamps the are specifcally desinged to help you reach your goals.  If you want I can whistle the theme to Donkey Kong while we train.

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I was checking out my friend Derek’s Blog, Cheek & Bluster and I saw a link to this site called The Blog Readability Test that rates Blog’s etc. and determines the level of education required to understand it.  So I gave it a shot.

Hmmm. I’m not sure how to take that.

It reminds me of a sitcom a while back (I can’t remember the name where the main character on the show had a Tivo.  Incase you did not know, Tivos can record show based on what it (the Tivo) thinks you would like. On the show the Tivo kept recording gay shows- the Tivo thought he was gay.  Hilarity ensued.

Apparently The Blog Readability Test believes I am dumb. This is not the first time it has been thought, but it is to the best of my knowledge the first time it has been thought by a non-living thing. I think I would prefer to be thought gay. 

Perhaps as my fellow Blogger Derek points out I have been dumbing it down for my intended audience.  Sadly, I know this not to be true (dammit).

In any case to The Blog Readability Test - I think you are way stupider than me.

So there.

Joshua Carter
http://carterfitness.com

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